What Is Assertive Communication?

A clear and accessible introduction to assertive communication, designed to help clients improve their interpersonal effectiveness.

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Professional version

Offers theory, guidance, and prompts for mental health professionals. Downloads are in Fillable PDF format where appropriate.

Client version

Includes client-friendly guidance. Downloads are in Fillable PDF format where appropriate.

Overview

Communication difficulties have been associated with various mental health issues, as well as problems in relationships and at work. This information handout is designed to introduce clients to the concept of assertive communication. It explains what assertive communication is, how it can be beneficial, and how it differs from non-assertive styles of communication. This resource especially helpful for clients who want to enhance their communication skills, improve their relationships, or develop new skills, such as being more assertive or setting boundaries with others.

Why Use This Resource?

Assertive communication is associated with improved mental health, stronger relationships, and better functioning at work. This resource:

  • Describes and compares different styles of communication.
  • Introduces assertiveness and highlights its many benefits.
  • Explains what assertive communication entails. 

Key Benefits

Clear

Describes the key ingredients of assertiveness, offering clients a solid understanding of what it is and what it isn’t.

Educational

Provides an accessible explanation of assertive versus non-assertive communication styles.

Flexible

Suitable for various therapeutic approaches, including cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) and dialectical behavior therapy (DBT).

Who is this for?

Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD)

For anxious clients who struggle to express themselves.

Social Anxiety Disorder (SAD)

To encourage confident, respectful social interactions.

Depression

Supports clients whose communication is hindered by guilt, hopelessness, or low self-worth.

Relationship Issues

For clients experiencing interpersonal difficulties that are impacted by communication problems.

Low Self-Esteem

Encourages development of self-respect and clear expression of needs.

Workplace Difficulties

Supports effective communication with colleagues and reduces vulnerability to bullying.

Integrating it into your practice

01

Assess

Identify clients experiencing communication difficulties or non-assertive styles.

02

Introduce

Use the resource to educate clients about assertiveness and frame it as a learnable skill.

03

Reflect

Review with clients their typical communication style and the impact it has.

04

Train

Use assertiveness training to help clients develop and refine their assertiveness skills.

Theoretical Background & Therapist Guidance

Effective communication allows people to share information, coordinate actions, and achieve their goals in personal and professional settings (Rohner & Schutz, 2024). It is crucial for forming and maintaining healthy relationships, enabling individuals to express their needs, build trust, address misunderstandings, and resolve conflicts (McKay et al., 2018). 

People communicate in unique ways, and research has identified several broad ‘communication styles’: clusters of conversational behaviors that constitute a communication pattern (Chłopicki, 2017). Communication styles can usually be categorized as either assertive (i.e., clear, honest, and respectful) or non-assertive (Bonham-Carter, 2012; Speed et al., 2018). Non-assertive (or unassertive) communication is usually divided into three styles:

  • Passive communication. This occurs when people avoid expressing themselves, whether to prevent conflict, evade rejection, or prioritize others' needs over their own. Passive communication is often associated with feelings of anxiety or guilt.
  • Aggressive communication. This involves people expressing themselves in a forceful and often disrespectful manner, which can come across as hostile and intimidating. It is often associated with feelings of anger or frustration.
  • Passive-aggressive communication. This entails expressing thoughts and feelings (particularly anger) in subtle or indirect ways. Examples of passive-aggressive communication include sarcasm, back-handed compliments, or sulking.

Based on leading definitions (e.g., Alberti & Emmons, 2017; Lange & Jakubowski, 1976; Linehan, 1979), key characteristics of assertive communication include:

  • Clear, direct, and honest communication.
  • Respect for one’s rights and the rights of others.
  • Persistence when necessary.
  • Fairness and equality in relationships.

Numerous assertiveness training programs have been developed and trialled over the years (see Rakos, 1991). Research indicates that assertiveness training can benefit both clinical and non-clinical groups (Omura et al., 2017; Speed et al., 2018), although the content of the training programmes can vary (Heimberg & Becker, 1981; Rakos, 1991). 

What's inside

  • Clear definitions of assertive and non-assertive communication styles.
  • Historical and theoretical overview of assertiveness training. 
  • Comparison table of communication styles (passive, aggressive, passive-aggressive, assertive).  
  • Summary of the components of assertiveness: honesty, confidence, respect, determination, and equality.  
  • Prompts for introducing the resource to clients and recommendations for further reading. 
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FAQs

Assertive communication is direct, respectful, and honest, without being aggressive or submissive. It emphasizes mutual respect and personal responsibility.
Yes, assertiveness is a skill that can be developed through psychoeducation, cognitive restructuring, behavior rehearsal, and real-world practice.
While assertiveness is often adaptive, it may be less suitable in some contexts, such as when there is a risk of harm or in cultures where direct communication is discouraged.

How This Resource Improves Clinical Outcomes

This resource helps and supports clients by:

  • Describing what assertiveness is.
  • Explaining what assertive communication entails. 
  • Highlighting the benefits of being assertive. 
  • Stressing that assertiveness is a skill that can be learned.

Clinicians Who Use This Resource Also Use

References And Further Reading

  • Alberti, R. E., & Emmons, M. L. (2017). Your perfect right: Assertiveness and equality in your life and relationships (10th ed.). Impact Publishers.  
  • Alden, L., & Cappe, R. (1981). Nonassertiveness: Skill deficit or selective self-evaluation? Behavior Therapy, 12, 107-114. DOI: 10.1016/S0005-7894(81)80111-6.  
  • Ames, D. R., & Flynn, F. J. (2007). What breaks a leader: The curvilinear relation between assertiveness and leadership. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 92, 307-324.
  • Birtchnell, J. (1996). How humans relate: A new interpersonal theory. Psychology Press.
  • Birtchnell, J. (2002). Relating in psychotherapy: The application of a new theory. Brunner Routledge. DOI: 10.1002/cpp.615.  
  • Bonham-Carter, D. (2012). Assertiveness: A practical guide. Icon Books.  
  • Chłopicki, W. (2017). Communication styles: an overview. Styles of Communication, 9(2).
  • Duckworth, M. P. (2009). Assertiveness skills and the management of related factors. In W. T. O’Donohue & J. E. Fisher (Eds.), General principles and empirically supported techniques of cognitive behavior therapy (pp. 124–132). John Wiley and Sons.
  • Duckworth, M. P. & Mercer, V. (2006). Assertiveness training. In J. E. Fisher & W. T. O’Donohue (Eds.), Practitioner’s guide to evidence-based psychotherapy (pp. 80-92). Springer.  
  • Eisler, R. M., Hersen, M., Miller, P. M., & Blanchard, E. B. (1975). Situational determinants of assertive behaviors. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, 43, 330–340. DOI: 10.1037/h0076717.  
  • Epstein, N., Degiovanni, I. S., & Jayne-Lazarus, C. (1978). Assertion training for couples. Journal of Behavior Therapy and Experimental Psychiatry, 9, 149-155. DOI: 10.1016/0005-7916(78)90062-9.  
  • Gerber, L. (2023). From middle-class American women to French managers: The transatlantic trajectory of assertiveness training, c. 1950s–1980s. History of Psychology, 26, 187–209. DOI: 10.1037/hop0000237.  
  • Gilbert, P., & Allan, S. (1994). Assertiveness, submissive behaviour and social comparison. British Journal of Clinical Psychology, 33, 295-306. DOI: 10.1111/j.2044-8260.1994.tb01125.x.  
  • Goldfried, M. R., & Davison, G. C. (1976). Clinical behavior therapy. Holt, Rinehart, and Winston.  
  • Hagberg, T., et al. (2023). Efficacy of transdiagnostic CBT for assertiveness. Internet Interventions, 32, 100629. DOI: 10.1016/j.invent.2023.100629.  
  • Hayward, M., Berry, K., McCarthy-Jones, S., Strauss, C., & Thomas, N. (2014). Beyond the omnipotence of voices. Psychosis, 6, 242-252.  
  • Heimberg, R. G., & Becker, R. E. (1981). Cognitive and behavioral models of assertive behavior. Clinical Psychology Review, 1, 353-373.  
  • Linehan, M. M. (1979). Structured cognitive-behavioral treatment of assertion problems. In Kendall & Hollon (Eds.), Cognitive-behavioral interventions (pp. 205-240).  
  • Linehan, M. M. (2015). DBT skills training manual (2nd ed.). Guilford Press.  
  • McKay, M., Davis, M., & Fanning, P. (2018). Messages: The communication skills workbook (4th ed.). New Harbinger.  
  • Omura, M., Maguire, J., Levett-Jones, T., & Stone, T. E. (2017). Assertiveness communication training in healthcare. International Journal of Nursing Studies, 76, 120-128.  
  • Paterson, R. J. (2022). The assertiveness workbook (2nd ed.). New Harbinger.  
  • Pfafman, T. M., & McEwan, B. (2014). Polite women at work. Women’s Studies in Communication, 37, 202-219.  
  • Rakos, R. F. (1991). Assertive behavior: Theory, research, and training. Routledge.  
  • Speed, B. C., Goldstein, B. L., & Goldfried, M. R. (2018). Assertiveness training: A forgotten evidence-based treatment. Clinical Psychology: Science and Practice, 25, e12216.  
  • Wolpe, J. (1954). Reciprocal inhibition. Archives of Neurology and Psychiatry, 72, 205–226.  
  • Wolpe, J. (1958). Psychotherapy by reciprocal inhibition. Stanford University Press.

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